So I've been wondering...Catholic piety requires one to abstain from sexual activity in order to be a leader in the Catholic Church. But...repressing healthy sexuality will only lead to the rise of unhealthy sexuality as far as I'm seeing... right? Years ago, in my first [Intro to] Psychology course the professor told us a story about a Muslim man who moved out of his predominantly Islamic country of origin to a more liberal 'western' country. He was taught to repress his sexual urges etc...but when he moved to the western world, and sexuality was everywher, he had a little more trouble. He found it harder to look away, and he eventually developed physical and emotional symptoms that he could not explain (they were essentially in response to the repression of his feelings). He got headaches, a nervous twitch, he was overwhelmed with guilt, became depressed...anyone want to take a stab at what would eliminate these symptoms? Well actually...in his case it would probably be a little more complicated because it's been engrained that he should repress and feel guilty about his own sexuality. But nonetheless, an acceptance or a release of sorts would probably eliminate his symptoms...learning to accept his sexuality as opposed to consciously repressing it at all times.
I've been thinking about this for two reasons. One, I just finished studying Compulsive Sexual Behaviours - interesting as hell, actually. Two, I just read that the head of the Irish Catholic Church is apologizing for helping to cover up a case of pedophilia. What in the hell??? Now this has nothing to do with being Catholic, Protestant, Muslim or Raelian...whatever you are .. but how do you sleep at night??? Some rando priest is abusing his power and decidedly abusing young children and you help him cover that up? Are you fucking kidding me?!?! And puh-leez...this is not the first sex scandal that I've read about recently, a lot of cases are from 10+ years ago...so this is not a recent phenomenon. Please don't give me all that modern times and modern problems, sex is everywhere, kids these days...mumble-jumble.. No Sire-y Bob!
I's seeing a consistent problem here...anyone else? So the heads of the Catholic Church are not allowed to engage in sexual activity, right?
....repressed sexuality......unhealthy sexuality....hmmmm...*cough friggedy cough**
Someone please get these men a blow-up doll or something so they'll stop touching your children!!!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Organic intimacy
I love talking to people, I love hearing their stories, immersing myself in someone else’s life until I get lost in it and I am so involved that it is as though I am there in those moments they are recounting, I am a living, breathing part of each story or anecdote they tell me.
When you’ve established that connection with someone, you never want to let go. Those moments when you are looking someone in the eye and listening intently, exchanging ideas, funny stories, harmless insults, whatever it may be…personally, I think those are some of the best moments of life. I call it organic intimacy.
These are the moments untainted by the pollution of the world, it is not forced, not superficial, not fake, it just Is. It doesn’t matter whether or not you’re wearing shoes, have paint all over your face, goose bumps all over your arms… It can happen anywhere: Outside the Renaud-Bray on Cote-des-Neiges, by the book deposit box at the NDG library, in a bar, on a ledge, next to the guerilla compost site set up behind Marianopolis (shh! don’t tell anyone), in a laundry room, at the top of the stairs outside the class you’re skipping, over coffee, sitting cross-legged in the middle of a basketball court…
I’m happy to say that I have met many people with whom I have been able to share these special moments. Some of them have stayed in my life, some left within hours, some returned unexpectedly, but thankfully the moments are still with me. And it’s exciting because I will keep having these amazing moments and I will keep meeting amazing people to share them with.
<3
When you’ve established that connection with someone, you never want to let go. Those moments when you are looking someone in the eye and listening intently, exchanging ideas, funny stories, harmless insults, whatever it may be…personally, I think those are some of the best moments of life. I call it organic intimacy.
These are the moments untainted by the pollution of the world, it is not forced, not superficial, not fake, it just Is. It doesn’t matter whether or not you’re wearing shoes, have paint all over your face, goose bumps all over your arms… It can happen anywhere: Outside the Renaud-Bray on Cote-des-Neiges, by the book deposit box at the NDG library, in a bar, on a ledge, next to the guerilla compost site set up behind Marianopolis (shh! don’t tell anyone), in a laundry room, at the top of the stairs outside the class you’re skipping, over coffee, sitting cross-legged in the middle of a basketball court…
I’m happy to say that I have met many people with whom I have been able to share these special moments. Some of them have stayed in my life, some left within hours, some returned unexpectedly, but thankfully the moments are still with me. And it’s exciting because I will keep having these amazing moments and I will keep meeting amazing people to share them with.
<3
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
B.I.R.T
Be it resolved that.....Naila thinks way too much for her own good.
I had this debate with myself about an hour ago...guess which side won?
As of this moment I am going to stop thinking so much, stop nit-picking at everything, stop over-analyzing and just Be. I can at least give it a shot - trying is better than simply 'not'.
>>>>>
It's going to be a productive night and I get to spend time with two super cool people tomorrow. All is well with the world :)
I had this debate with myself about an hour ago...guess which side won?
As of this moment I am going to stop thinking so much, stop nit-picking at everything, stop over-analyzing and just Be. I can at least give it a shot - trying is better than simply 'not'.
>>>>>
It's going to be a productive night and I get to spend time with two super cool people tomorrow. All is well with the world :)
Monday, March 8, 2010
a visitor
The sun came out to visit today. We chatted, had some tea and cookies, though he told me he prefers Sunny D, and we got to catch up and reminisce about the good old days. I told him he could stop by anytime, I enjoyed his company. He said he might stop by again very soon, he apparently loves my baking.
Because I have made the mistake of ‘not’ listening to my mother in the past few days and not necessarily worn the most ‘suitable’ jacket I decided to wear my big black coat (despite the voice in my head and the weather report that said it would be warm out). Once I had crossed the street to get to my bus stop I noticed a guy walking to the hairdresser’s. He wasn’t wearing his jacket; he had on a light sweater. Damn I thought. Not only was it warm out, now I had the pleasure of lugging my coat around in addition to my already heavy tote. Yuck. But here’s the thing that made me smile – he was also wearing flip flops! Now I don’t know how many know this… but I hate shoes. I hate socks. My feet get terribly claustrophobic and I would love my life if it meant I could go barefoot (preferably on clean-esque roads and through warm sand) all day, every day. And this guy was wearing flip flops!! My hero. :)
Then…
I’m off the bus, walking downtown, multi-tasking …
I’m carrying my tote, my jacket, my lunch (warm Thai Express chicken fried rice) and phone. I am in the process of mentally figuring out the job descriptions for the directors I need to hire this week. Then my phone rings – yaay another call! I’m flustered and I have no hands. I have to remember why I called her in the first place. Prices? Venue? Curriculum? Wait – how many did you say I needed? Oh, so that won’t work? Damn. Ok. I’ll figure it out. Ok thanks. Then she asks, what your theme? The Million Dollar Question… and my mind is blank, I cannot for the life of me remember what the theme is. I have only been reading and re-reading the curriculum and activities (relating to said theme) for the past 3 weeks! Damn. Not I look like an idiot. Nope, a scatter-brained, leave-my-keys-in-the-freezer idiot. Double yuck.
But as I’m walking towards the big brown doors leading into the library (yes, the library on a beautiful Sunday afternoon…this is my life) I see a guy wearing shorts. YEssss! Awesome! Made my day :)
Spring is here.
Then …
I finally get to spend some quality time (much needed) with my best friend. There was major catch-up to do, stories to share, jokes for her to ‘not’ laugh at. Sigh…I’m really not as funny as I think I am sometimes, then again, I know I’m not that funny…but I have my moments.
The catch-up continues for a few hours as we make our way to Concordia, into my parent’s car, to khane, chatting in the bathroom, in the corner outside, by the nandi line, downstairs in the shoe area…
Dinner with the family, a quick glimpse of the awards on TV tonight – Taylor Lautner and Kristin Stewart. Zac Effron… hmmm…awards for what? Costumes? Ok…that’s my queue! Off to prepare for Monday...
My to do list has been replenished, fb has been checked, emails answered, prep work is done for the presentation on “The Cognitive and Affective Structure of Paranoid Delusions”.
I might shower before bed.
It’s been a good day – even mildly productive. Loads to do tomorrow.
Goodnight
Because I have made the mistake of ‘not’ listening to my mother in the past few days and not necessarily worn the most ‘suitable’ jacket I decided to wear my big black coat (despite the voice in my head and the weather report that said it would be warm out). Once I had crossed the street to get to my bus stop I noticed a guy walking to the hairdresser’s. He wasn’t wearing his jacket; he had on a light sweater. Damn I thought. Not only was it warm out, now I had the pleasure of lugging my coat around in addition to my already heavy tote. Yuck. But here’s the thing that made me smile – he was also wearing flip flops! Now I don’t know how many know this… but I hate shoes. I hate socks. My feet get terribly claustrophobic and I would love my life if it meant I could go barefoot (preferably on clean-esque roads and through warm sand) all day, every day. And this guy was wearing flip flops!! My hero. :)
Then…
I’m off the bus, walking downtown, multi-tasking …
I’m carrying my tote, my jacket, my lunch (warm Thai Express chicken fried rice) and phone. I am in the process of mentally figuring out the job descriptions for the directors I need to hire this week. Then my phone rings – yaay another call! I’m flustered and I have no hands. I have to remember why I called her in the first place. Prices? Venue? Curriculum? Wait – how many did you say I needed? Oh, so that won’t work? Damn. Ok. I’ll figure it out. Ok thanks. Then she asks, what your theme? The Million Dollar Question… and my mind is blank, I cannot for the life of me remember what the theme is. I have only been reading and re-reading the curriculum and activities (relating to said theme) for the past 3 weeks! Damn. Not I look like an idiot. Nope, a scatter-brained, leave-my-keys-in-the-freezer idiot. Double yuck.
But as I’m walking towards the big brown doors leading into the library (yes, the library on a beautiful Sunday afternoon…this is my life) I see a guy wearing shorts. YEssss! Awesome! Made my day :)
Spring is here.
Then …
I finally get to spend some quality time (much needed) with my best friend. There was major catch-up to do, stories to share, jokes for her to ‘not’ laugh at. Sigh…I’m really not as funny as I think I am sometimes, then again, I know I’m not that funny…but I have my moments.
The catch-up continues for a few hours as we make our way to Concordia, into my parent’s car, to khane, chatting in the bathroom, in the corner outside, by the nandi line, downstairs in the shoe area…
Dinner with the family, a quick glimpse of the awards on TV tonight – Taylor Lautner and Kristin Stewart. Zac Effron… hmmm…awards for what? Costumes? Ok…that’s my queue! Off to prepare for Monday...
My to do list has been replenished, fb has been checked, emails answered, prep work is done for the presentation on “The Cognitive and Affective Structure of Paranoid Delusions”.
I might shower before bed.
It’s been a good day – even mildly productive. Loads to do tomorrow.
Goodnight
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Good Morning
You can't go away
Just to come back the same
Girl, you can't go away
Just to come back the same
---Better Sorry Than Safe by Two Hours Traffic (great song!)
Today I'm grateful for a lot of things. I'm grateful that the past 2 months have tried and tested by last nerve, my short fuse, my last teardrop. I'm grateful that I hit a new low, only to look up and find a new ledge upon which I could rest for a while. I'm grateful that I didn't get what I wanted, when I wanted it, so I could finally realise just what it was that I needed. Yes, corny, but so true.
It has taken a long time to get to where I am this morning and it has been a tough road, for those of you who have been around for the ride. Okay, okay, I'm feeling corny and sappy and somewhat unoriginal this morning, too. But anyways... I know that recently, when it has all decidedly 'come down around me', I was reluctant, almost angered when asked to accept the phrase "it all happens for a reason". But today I realised why I needed to go through the recent string of unfortunate events... and the string of oh-so-great-oh-so-much-fun-i-love-you-all-and-the-ground-you-walk-on events. hey led me to many a realisation, rekindling old friendships, meeting new people, having new experiences, writing new speeches (on the spot ones lol), having new experiences, questioning myself, dusting myself off to find a new and improved version underneath...it has been rough, but in retrospect, rough in the most beautiful way.
P.S. Here is what I'm happy about today:
- My new ginseng tea (with honey)
- Watching Sharik say "buh bye" to the little boy for the umpteenth time (cuter every time)
- My deepened laugh lines
- My new brown leggings
- Sehar, the only consistent lunch date in my life, and one of the best people to ever happen to me (yes, she 'happened' to me, and I'm still in awe that she has the ability to handle me week after week and even miss me!)
- The sweet mix of fear and excitement that is bubbling over in me when I think about the possibilities, new directions, failures, constructive criticism and successes of the next two weeks. (Bring on the camp planning sessions!!!)
- The Morning Glory notebook I'm going to start writing in soon
- Sam, who knows how to make me smile and will only throw cabbage at me, if that is indeed my weapon of choice because he's all about the equal treatment of women and all that jazz hahaha
- 7am showers that start at 8
- My mom and her cute new haircut
Love love love :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
